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AN EMKA

New member
Aug 9, 2021
4
4
3
Greece
Hey! Some months ago I found out that I like girls. Actually, I was identifying myself as bisexual cause I didn't know for sure what I am. And then after some time, it was clear to me that I am 100%, lesbian and I don't have absolutely anything to do with guys. But now sometimes I see some nice guys in public or on the internet and I think "Oh he is so cute, he is so beautiful, I would probably date him." and then I remember I am lesbian I'm not supposed to like guys. So this is my question,

how do you think can a lesbian like men sometimes? Is it even a romantic attraction? maybe I just can tell If this boy is handsome and cute and hot but never feel the same as when I have a crush with a girl. Maybe it's just a friendly/childish sympathy and nothing else. Am I still lesbian If this is a romantic attraction?
 

Gigi

Member
Jul 2, 2021
31
21
8
Brighton
Hi An Emka,

there’s nothing wrong about how you feel. Think of Kinsey’s scale of degrees of sexual orientation. A lot of people is not 100% straight or gay. There’s bi in the middle, but some are in the middle of bi and straight or gay. And secondly sexuality is a fluent thing. There were times when I wouldn’t have thought of finding a boyfriend, although girls didn’t do much for me. Feelings changed....

It’s the personality: if you find someone you love really, do it with all your heart, irrespective if it’s him or her.

Gigi
 
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AN EMKA

New member
Aug 9, 2021
4
4
3
Greece
So actually I can be lesbian and having some attraction to guys periodically? This doesn't make me bisexual. And as I understand bisexuality is about liking both genders equally. But as you said sexuality is a fluent so nothing is absolutely standard everything is acceptable.
 
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Gigi

Member
Jul 2, 2021
31
21
8
Brighton
Ciao carissima,

that’s it. Don’t look for a being labelled as ....
Listen to your heart or to the butterflies in your stomach. If it’s a nice girl: absolutely okay; but if it suddenly happens to be a boy? Equally okay.
You might have a preference: girls; that’s why you label yourself lesbian, but sexuality is not carved in stone.
Important: enjoy your (sex-)life.

Gigi
 
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Axle2152

New member
Hey! Some months ago I found out that I like girls. Actually, I was identifying myself as bisexual cause I didn't know for sure what I am. And then after some time, it was clear to me that I am 100%, lesbian and I don't have absolutely anything to do with guys. But now sometimes I see some nice guys in public or on the internet and I think "Oh he is so cute, he is so beautiful, I would probably date him." and then I remember I am lesbian I'm not supposed to like guys. So this is my question,

how do you think can a lesbian like men sometimes? Is it even a romantic attraction? maybe I just can tell If this boy is handsome and cute and hot but never feel the same as when I have a crush with a girl. Maybe it's just a friendly/childish sympathy and nothing else. Am I still lesbian If this is a romantic attraction?
I think Gigi summed it up very well but I thought I might add some of my experiences. I have at times questions my sexuality, perhaps regretting not "being straight" and getting married and all that jazz. Sometimes I find some women very attractive but similar to what you said, I'm gay, how's that supposed to work? I think it is important to know that people don't have to adhere to any sort of label, whether it's bisexual, gay, lesbian, non-binary, just be you. If you happen to like a guy and want to date him, go for it, you might find a partner, a friend but more importantly it will help you figure things out. Think of it like trying new foods. One example that came to mind is I really like sushi, but so many people refuse to try it, even the deep fried stuff that isn't raw. You don't have to try sushi, but if you do try it you will gain the experience, you might find you like it or you might find that terrible and you'll know never to try that stuff again.
 
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