What if I am Nothing?

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Community Forum
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New member
Sep 10, 2021
So here's the thing. Just left a 20 year marriage to male (3 month) It was bad, he's a drunk. I was badly sexually abused as a child (over 10 years) which resulted in 3 long term male relates with alcoholics.
When it comes to men I put my value in sex, even though it's not hugely enjoyable.
Flip side... even as a child I had girl relations... Mutual touching, kissing. It never felt dirty or bad like the boy stuff. Even into adulthood... in my marriage I kissed a few women and could have done so for hours and hours... I Dream about women, I want to date a woman but I've has 'Goldstar' thrown at me like I'm defective...

What if..
Here's my fear. I am nothing. Not Bi or hetero.
What if I fit in no where.
I'm 50. Not exactly a spring chicken.. and frankly who wants to date a 50 yr old woman? Ugh I hate that I put my value in who would want to date me despite my knowing better.
I don't fit any where. I never have. 😞


Jul 2, 2021
Ciao Nicole,

I don’t believe your judgment about yourself. I guess, when you meet the right person, you’ll be a wonderful girl.

Problem is to meet the right person, but I hope, the butterflies in your stomach will alarm you.

And don’t look for labels. Look for a person with whom you can share love.

I wish you a wonderful person to meet.



New member
Sep 15, 2021
It might seem like there couldn't possibly be anyone who would want you, but that just isn't true. Statistically, it's downright impossible that there isn't anyone out there who would like be with you. You just haven't met them. It's hard to find people, but you still have life to live and breath in your lungs, so you can still find someone to enjoy it with. You don't need a label to know who you are, you just have to live it. And someone will come along. In the meantime, just enjoy yourself, work on your skills and things you love, and someone else will be able to see all the good things about you and come to love them too.
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